There are instances in one’s life when he prefers to be alone or deal with matters that are troubling him on his own. It is in these circumstances when people tend to push other people away. However, this is unhealthy especially because it can result to severed relationships. Apart from this, there are several other reasons on why we tend to push people away, according to experts, as well as some of the measures that we can do to stop doing so.
First Reason: To appear capable and strong
In the corporate world, stakeholders and big bosses within the management needs to appear capable and strong with a goal to earn the respect and trust of their subordinates. Within the family unit, pushing people away to appear capable and strong is apparent to moms. However, the desire to be greatly capable, either in leading subordinates, or attempting to multitask and take care of a household, is heightened by a feeling of vulnerability that is often triggered by responsibility.
In order to stop pushing people away just to appear capable and strong, open yourself up to accepting help and support. You will feel more capable if you are able to connect with yourself and acknowledge that help is often available.
Problematic behaviors
You may be pushing the people who matter to you away, without you knowing it. This can be because of some problematic behaviors you are dealing with such as addiction or depression. You may also be dwelling with loss or resentment, or even constantly comparing yourself to others, which are still some other forms of problematic behaviors.
The best way to combat this is to acknowledge what you are going through and accept that you may be having a rough time that leads to your problematic behaviors. It is during these times that instead of pushing people away, you need to involve them more in your life in an attempt to seek for support and guidance. However, this will only be possible if you acknowledge and accept that you indeed are going through a tough time.
To seek for love, care, and attention
Finally, there are also individuals who push people away in an attempt to look for love and attention. Their reason for doing so is perhaps when they push people away from them, those that love them unconditionally are persistent in trying to break down their barriers. It is in this way that they feel loved.
Know that love, care and attention is better given if reciprocated because this is human nature. There is a great chance that when people get tired of trying, they will eventually cease in being persistent and this goes true even for the people that we love.
Pushing the ones we love away in an attempt to be alone or to handle our troubles and misery by ourselves is truly unhealthy. This deed, not only severs our relationships with the ones who matter the most to us, but it also has a negative impact on our overall well-being. It is human nature to be social and seeking the love, care and the help of the ones we love is more natural than pushing them away.